Enough Is Enough!

I’ve had it!

I’m fed up with my dumb self.

My desire to know everything, to keep with everything, to have everything, to experience everything. It’s time to call it quits. It’s time to count the cost and pursue holiness anyway.

A year and a half of unfulfilled promises
Looking back at my blog post from December 25th, I see that most of my planning and aim to reduce my debt has gone by the wayside. I still weigh as much as I did at the beginning of the year. I don’t spend any more time regularly in prayer or Bible study now than I did back then. I’m not married or even heading in that direction.

Basically, 2009 has been pretty bleak for me in a lot of ways. In fact, it doesn’t only start there. Even in June 2008, I was seeing that things were out of control. I think it goes back even further than that.

Granted, things did change for the positive over the summer as I began to see a glimmer of hope. I began playing piano at a new church where my good friend Greg is the pastor, and that is turning out to be an exciting process. We are starting to see some growth in the church, both in numbers as well as in life within the fellowship.

Sadly, when I survey the state of the American church, comfort and excess have replaced giving and sacrifice as Christian virtues in the 21st century. The mantra of contemporary Christian circles seems to be “Man’s chief end is to get lots of stuff, end enjoy it for ever. And be sure there’s good air conditioning and comfortable seats in church while you’re at it!” The Puritans taught us that “Man’s chief end is to glorify God, and enjoy Him for ever.” Quite a discrepancy.

Well, I’m tired of the stuff. I’m tired of distractions. I’m tired of clutter in my life – physically, emotionally, psychologically, spiritually. I grow weary of the undisciplined nature of my current state of existence. It’s time for a change.

This morning, Pastor Greg read a little bit out of E.M. Bounds book The Weapon of Prayer. I’ve read his book Power Through Prayer a few times and every time I read it, I am convicted of my woeful lack of prayer. This week, I will work my way through The Weapon of Prayer. I’ll also focus more of my time on prayer. Real prayer, not the superficial stuff.

My online life takes up too much of my time. My iPhone provides more distractions than I even know what to do with. So it is time to move forward. Instead of feeling like a victim of my circumstances, I’m going to take control. In the next three and a half months, I will regain control and discipline in my life.

Fasting will be a huge part
In the process of regaining control, I must regularly deny the flesh through fasting. For the most part, these will be day-long water/juice fasts, though there may very well be extended fasting happening as well. This past spring, I experienced the power that fasting had in recovering my focus as I went through three 5+ day fasts. Since then, the longest I’ve gone without food has been 12-15 hours.

This is an urgent need
As easy as it would be for me to sit back (like I have for months and years even) and say that I’ll get around to it later, there is no time like the present to begin to see transformative changes in my life. No more of the “just one more time” mentality. That simply delays the inevitible. To quote Professor Harold Hill from The Music Man, “‘Pile up too many tomorrows and you’ll find that you’ve collected nothing but a bunch of empty yesterdays.” Do something now!

What you can do

• Pray for your pastor. He needs it!
• I encourage you to commit to make some changes in your life. That one nasty habit you’ve been meaning to overcome. The 10 pounds you’ve gained since college. Or the 50 pounds. Or the 100. You get the picture. Read more. Watch less.

Let us hear the conclusion of the whole matter:

Fear God and keep His commandments,
For this is man’s all.
For God will bring every work into judgment,
Inlcuding every secret thing,
Whether good or evil.

Ecclesiastes 12:13-14

• Encourage me. Self sacrifice is never easy. 100 days of it will be greuling for me. If you happen to see me online, encourage me and ask me how things are going. Pray for me. Tell me you are praying for me and I’ll be sure to pray for you as well.

On The Brink of Depression, But He Brought Me Up Out of the Pit

I waited patiently for the LORD;
And He inclined to me,
And heard my cry.

He also brought me up out of a horrible pit,
Out of the miry clay,
And set my feet upon a rock,
And established my steps.

He put a new song in my mouth –
Praise yo our God;
Many will see it and fear,
And will trust in the LORD.

Psalm 40:1-3

As I look back on my life, I can remember certain events (a car wreck, a tumor, a kidney stone) that were extremely challenging for me, but no period of time can compare with what I have gone through in the last year (and even the last 18 months, really). But beginning in March, things began to slowly get better for me.

The darkness began to disipate and things began looking up.

Some things that really helped this happen included:

• Reawakening some friendships that I had allowed to become dormant, through Twitter/Facebook as well as in real life
• A determination to seek God through fasting and prayer
• Spending more time reading and listening to the Word of God and sermons/podcasts/blogs about Christian topics

Now these may seem pretty basic to all of us (myself included), but it gets so easy to drift away. We get this sense that the little things may not matter so much, or what we aren’t really all that useful or necessary in the kingdom of God.

The thing is, no amount of excuses or justifications or whatever suffice. On the flip side, no amount of determinations to do the right thing suffice either.

But it’s not about doing any one thing or another. It’s about passionately pursuing our Lord. The thing that I have been lacking for the last few years has really been a clearly defined goal.

You are my portion, O LORD;
I have said that I would keep Your words.

I entreated Your favor with my whole heart;
Be merciful to me according to Your word.

I thought about my ways,
And turned my feet to Your testimonies.

I made haste, and did not delay
To keep Your commandments.

The cords of the wicked have bound me,
But I have no forgotten Your law.

At midnight I will rise to give thanks to You,
Because of Your righteous judgments.

I am a companion of all who fear You,
And of those who keep Your precepts.

The earth, O LORD, is full of Your mercy;
Teach me Your statutes.

Psalm 119:57-64

Look at verse 60 again. “I made haste, and did not delay To keep Your commandments.” Though I have been keeping God’s commandments lately, I can’t say that I have made haste in doing so. Just because we don’t seem to be living a victorious life doesn’t mean that we are out of the will of God. Through this whole year, that one truth has stuck with me, despite other people telling me otherwise.

“Has the LORD as great delight in burnt offerings and sacrifices,
As in obeying the voice of the LORD?
Behold, to obey is better than sacrifice,
And to heed than the fat of rams.

For rebellion is as the sin of witchcraft,
And stubbornness is as iniquity and idolatry,
Because you have rejected the word of the LORD,
He also has rejected you from being king.”

1 Samuel 15:22,23

Obedience ushers in the blessings of God
My pastor likes to say that “Obedience ushers in the blessings of God.” I often hear that, but it gets so familiar that I overlook it at times. Something else to draw from the above verses: delayed obedience is the same as blatent disobedience.

Blessed is the man
Who walks not in the counsel of the ungodly,
Nor stands in the path of sinners,
Nor sits in the seatr of the scornful;

But his delight is in the law of the LORD,
And in His law he meditates day and night.

Day and night…

He shall be like a tree
Planted by the rivers of water,
That brings forth its fruit in its season,
Whose leaf also shall not wither,
And whatever he does shall prosper.

Psalm 1:1-3

Whatever he does shall prosper. Who has this guaranteed prosperity? The person who delight to meditate on the law of the LORD day and night.

Brothers and sisters, that is the real prosperity gospel! None of this name-it-claim-it, blab-it-grab-it, bossing God around like a genie in a Bible business. That stuff isn’t scriptural.

It’s exactly the same as what God told Joshua when Israel finally entered the land:

“Only be strong and very courageous, that you may observe to do according to all the law which Moses My servant commanded you; do not turn from it to the right hand or to the left, that you may prosper wherever you go.

“This Book of the Law shall not depart from your mouth, but you shall meditate in it day and night, that you may observe to do according to all that is written in it. For then you will make your way prosperous, and then you will have good success.

Have I not commanded you? Be strong and of good courage; do not be afraid, nor dismayed, for the LORD your God is with you wherever you go.”

Joshua 1:7-9

All this to say that I read a couple of blog posts today that really jumped out at me.

• How Can Pain Be Good? (The Blazing Center)
• You Are What Your Tweet (The Blazing Center)

Debt Is Dumb

I foresee 2009 being one of the best years of my life.

As I stand here looking at this year, the thing that strikes me about what is about to happen is one solitary word.

Discipline
Discipline is a good thing. In fact, it is a wonderful thing. I am not talking about punishment, but discipline.  You know, discipline:

Training expected to produce a specific character or pattern of behavior, especially training that produces moral or mental improvement.

So what specific character or pattern of behavior do I want to train? It’s actually going to be a lot. I’ll focus on fleshing out some of the plans over the next couple of weeks.

To begin with, I am going to focus on debt.

Theologically, debt says that I want now what God has not seen fit to give me yet. It God’s sovereignity and places my own wisdom above His wisdom. It says that I know better what I need than God does. Ultimately, debt gratifies my flesh and denies the Spirit.

Maybe you disagree. That’s fine if you do.

The rich rules over the poor,
And the borrower is servant to the lender. — Proverbs 22:7

Owe no one anything except to love one another, for he who loves another has fulfilled the law. — Romans 13:8

Rather go to bed supperless than rise in debt. — Benjamin Franklin

What I plan on doing this year is to live as frugally as possible, and put as much money as possible into debt elimination. I am going to be following Dave Ramsey’s plan.

1. $1,000 to start an Emergency Fund
2. Pay off all debt using the Debt Snowball
3. 3 to 6 months of expenses in savings
4. Invest 15% of household income into Roth IRAs and pre-tax retirement
5. College funding for children
6. Pay off home early
7. Build wealth and give!
   Invest in mutual funds and real estate

I’ve been fully aware of him for around three years. I used his strategies to eliminate around $10,000 during the first two years. Then 2008 came.

I bought a used truck in February, but the payments on that have substantially slowed me down. I have had dental work done (root canal, and two crowns), my dog was hit by a car which cost me around $500, and some other minor “emergencies” have come and gone. Plus I have spent about just as much money as I make. So it’s time to get this all under control.

This is the first part of my discipline adventure!